The day before tomorrow.

Today is Saturday, but it really feels like Sunday. So much to do, but I can't seem to get started. or when I do i just do so little. Though I started at 9:55 nothing is done... I am sick. Went to a fish bar with for lunch and than to buy a calculator for chemistry. It all envolved into a food-shopping with my aunt as a driver and knowing that getting anywhere nowadays is a waste of time for me, I also went skirt shopping (wanted to do that for a few days now -which you, Oriana & Sara know about from your blog). Resulted in a simple black skirt and a really cute dotted black shirt. I am feeling not right though. Both mentally and pchysically. I do not know if I am tired, sick or in a bad mood, I just.. yeah, I think I am sick. Head starts to feel hurtful..

The skirt is from H&M by the way,
I think I need to go and get some rest,
really can't afford being sick now,
As you wished, ori, more detailed about my life. For you. (Hope you won't be dissapointed).
Got to go. Tea and bed? tea and TV? Tea and histology? Which opition seems the best?

tea and vitamine C for sure. ;>

Friday 27 of October, a normal day.

It's really cold in here.

A whole-size carpet was put into my room today and because of that i had to move to another room without a radiator (or rather there is one, but it is not working...). After a day of quite monotonous chemistry lecture during which I fell asleep (though was fighting it for over a half an hour!) and an English lesson of which i though is just NOT ENOUGH (she's constantly talking and we are NOT). -, I went for a meal at a milk-bar followed by a casserole (fitting more and more in that stomach). Despite a very tempting offer for a little shopping tour I decided to stay home and study. What was nice is that during more less an hour 3 people texted me or just sent me signals. Isn't that nice? people like me! :D

Well, out of that study not much happened I fell asleep with the book in my hand, woke up freezing and decided to make one of those nuddels soups to warm me up and listen to some music while preparing it. The mp3 player was out of battery so I ended up in from of the computer and during the time the player takes to charge I am writing this note.
I think though that the little equipment had have enough of nutricious electrons (or whatever is charging it), so i am off to eat and to continue (hopefully concious) studying the human nervous system. ;)

Take care people and don't forget to educate yourself while doing what you're doing (I can't seem to forgrt it!), love you.

//k.

Saturday. First uni party...

So i did go out. Only five o'clock I was decided not to go and to study instead (reason and peer pressure), but already at 8... well, I got this message, people were going i wouldn't be going by myself, so... i went. :D (happy like an animal)

There were not much fokes there in the beginning, but as the time went by and the beer started working I got happier and happier to my surprice discovering that not only there was a big crowd there and it got warm and humid, but also that i have no problems dancing on the stage (3 people wide, 3 people long). For the first time in my life I really didn't care how I am dancing and who I am dancing with... Constantly on the stage, looking at the crowd and just "singing" to them while dancing... Fun.

At 12 I though i had enough fun not to regret going home, but being in Gdańsk i found only 2 girls going to Sopot (except for the people I am with) at 2 o'clock. Okay I thought, I taking a cab with the girls. These turned out to be weird about financial issues of paying for the cab and one of the guys from "my" group called, so i thought, ok I CAn take the train at 2:50 with them, (REMEMBER that i was going to have an anatomy "whole hand - everything: musces, tendons, bones, blood vassles, vains etc. test) well... the train never came.
Or, rather it passed us by and didn't stop. ( AAaaaaaargh!) Hm. Me and two other girls wanted to take a cab from there- home, but the guys wanted to go ON the railroads to the next, next stop hoping there will be a train from there (the rails are being renovated so sometimes the train only goes to Wrzeszcz).
And, my dears, guess what i did? Of course i went on the railroads!! (me alone and two guys), I was scared of the train running me over and constantly talking about the monday test, but it was fun. Something unusuall anyway...

BUT, there was no train from there either.
We went to Ggdańsk by the train in other direction, wated there in teh rail station and than finally got the train home.. I was in bed at 5:15 a.m.

It was a bit too long for me knowing how much i had to do for the next day, but I do not regret it. better 3 h too long than not at all!!!!

;)

:(

My group yet another time did not go out. I know you know I am not a party animal, but I would like to do something from time to time. I feel like sent to a deserted island. And most of the time it fits me very well, but not tonight. Not these past 2 weeks. You know, at home, I lived with 3 other people, it's quite a company, I never could really be alone, I had to go out for a walk to do that. Now the situation is reversed. I am alone basically all the time and would like to go out not to be that anymore. And I know it's med school, and i know it's university and responsibility for your own actions, but for the first: We could go out once in 3 weeks, right?! and for the second (probably the most crushing): We always plan and never do. I get excited and wait for that day just to find out everyone in bailing on me. Sucks big time. Now they are planning again, but I do not believe in it this time. I can only see the scary anatomy test the day after tomorow and therafter chemistry and histology. With the perspective of passing only possibly by luck and feeling unsatsfied and humiliated just to come back to an empty house knowing the only thing I should do is study. And I WOULD like to do it, just not to feel that terrible the next day, and I DO like the subjects I am studying and i could even say do like the studying itself, but feeling so miserable just makes me wanna go to bed and stay there.

I guess it is called having a bad mood. I guess this is called being down. But what can I do if there is no social force to drift my study willingness. Or maybe I shopuld say me being happy. HOw can I keep on doing stuff, when at the time nothing makes sense?
Maybe except for my university. How can it be possible that right now I feel like the only thing I have left is my med school? The only thing that can surprise me, the only thing that is constantly changing and interesting. The only thing that envolves and goes forward, cuz people here don't keep their promisses (and the scheduled anatomy test does). Sounds stupid, you say: their only fault is that they changed their minds a couple of times... (though was last minute) ...

Stupid Kasia, frankly, if I don't go to today's pary I will start to have some hidden feeling against them, and darek just called asking if I'm going... well, what can I do if not go?! Oherwise I will go COMPLETELY MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

week 2.

So what happened the second week? Much and not a lot I'd say... There was this one episode, which i will write about later. What is a primery issue now is that I gave the adress of this blog to someone from my group (paweł) and now i cannot write what I I want cuz he might be included. Stupid me, I just couln't say no, the way he was convincing me (still makes me laugh whenever I think of it).

Except for that, well, I fainted on my first anatomy prosectorium with a sample of a real human hand. It felt really embarassing and I nearly cryed, but Kasia went out with me (or rather carried me out) and consoled me. We really talked and apparently we are quite similar in some points (she's a freak too - which is both sad and funny). A nice real coversation I'd say, aboutlife.
Well, in the end after carefull examination of what mught be the reaon of me fainting (eg. the connection between the subconsciousness and the bodie's reactions) I discovered that I was totally fine on the next prosectorium (happy). In the beginning people were being understanding, but now, after 2 weeks they make fun of me more and more (which starts to be a bit irritating).

Than weekend. Well, got a little bit lazy there (family can be annoying to a med student who tryes to study and gets distracted every 10 min.). Aside from that I got out my bad mood, originating from NOT going out ever during those 2 weeks (!!!), by studying solemly and thereafter listening to "pink" areosmith (it just makes me feel like a cute scamp).

Well, what else to say? OH!
I am not sure whether I will update this page until thursday, so...

BIG, FUCKING, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY GIRL SARA, MY HONEY, MY FREAK, MY PINKY, MY GIG (okay, you're not, I am taking that back... ;P) ANYWAY SARA GIRL ENJOY YOUR B-DAY I WILL PARTY FOR THAT OCATION TOO!!! yOU HAVE A CANDLE FROM ME TO BLOW (ONE WISH IS ATTACHED).. :*

Isn't life just perfect? You know, afterall...
;)

Unkept-kept promice.

I promoced to write something today, but I discovered that I am not happy with publishing "whatever". Let's just wait for the inspiration, shell we?

;)

My uni. The first week.

I promiced to write this post, though it feels kinda unnecessary to keep promices to noone (if you know what I mean).

I have survived my first week in uni. At first everything was so exciting and I was curious how it all really looks like (still am a bit, a lot of things were mostly intreductions), now, however I am starting to feel the pressure of all the study on my shoulders. Things are still new, but slowely becdome "not so much anymore", I can only say the opposite about my groupmates. I recognize their faceses, I know their names, I know more less their sence of humour, but I don't REALLY know them. It's exciting, getting to know people, it really is. And the best thing is that you don't really know when "still getting to know" becomes the unual knowing... :)

So, in short, the 203 sudents of medicine of my uni were divided into 12 groups and thereafter into subgroups "a" and "b". So far I have been hanging out with 7 (more less) people from my subgroup 11b, though I find nearly all people in it nice (rest I don't know that much). So, us, that is 5 girls and 3 boys are a fun group I'd say, mostly making fun of me making fool out of myself, but don't worry I laugh at them in return. I'd can say that Maciek (guy) and Robert (guy) have a similar sense of humour to me. Kasia (from kielce- is how we call her) can fit there too. Then there is this really quiet Krysia (girl) (the sia part is read just as in my name), she mearly moves her face, which me and Robert find very funny (he counted once that in like 2 h with us --laughing constantly--- she smiled twice), then there's Marta, just a really nice girl, Magda, kinda quitet at times and a bit serious, but ok, and also Pawel (guy), who always sees all the sarcastic (but not mean, that much) facts. When he says something he SAYS IT (short and consise, but very true). There you have it. What else I can say is that most of those people are from different parts of the country and rent places so close to uni that I would be the only one going by "pendetag", if not Robert, who rides with me (thank God, the alley from the station is known for its exhibicionists). He is tall and big so I am not afraid. :D (though sometimes he's not comming cuz he repeats the year and doens't need to listen to soem lectures twice --buhuuhu!!)
yeah, pretty much people are a year older in our group (Robert, Maciek, Pawel and this one girl for sure, but might be more).

The lectures if you are interested are ... interesting (expecpt for chemistry on which we all nearly fell asleep), the first "wet" prosektorium will be tomorrow and I really need to study anatomy now!!!

So, as a finish I can only mention what subjects I've got and I'm off, cuz time flyes so damn fast!
they are: histology, embriology, general chemistry, history of medicine and... anatomy of course. Fun so far, though a lot of study, I am happy with what I have so far (and PE!! I forgot PE.)
I will perhaps tel you more if you'll for freak's sake start visiting my page.

Love you, but need you to comment me at times,
kasia

Soon...

...there'll be a note about my uni (at least the first impressions ;P)
Wait patiently....